Graveyard Shift Part 2
by bee87
Summary: Continuation of Graveyard Shift Part 1. How do Edward and Bella move past the death of their daughter Renesmee? What will happen to them? Will they have a happily ever after?
1. Grief

**A/N Here is the first chapter of Graveyard Shift Part 2. Sorry it's taken so long. Warning you may want to have tissues at the ready coz this is a sad chapter.**

**Disclaimer for entire story: Don't own Twilight – I wish**

**EPOV**

"Hi Alice, it's Edward can you come over here please?"

"Sure, why?"

"It's Bella. I think she needs a bit more help today than I can give her" I said sombrely.

"OK, I'll be there in ten" she rang off.

I put the phone back in the cradle and walked into what would have been _her _nursery. I still couldn't say or think my daughter's name yet, the pain was still to real and deep. Bella was stood in her pyjamas hovering over the crib, rocking it backwards and forwards and softly singing a lullaby.

"Bella, sweetheart. Alice is going to be coming over soon so you may want to go have a shower before she gets here"

"Shh, Edward. Don't wake her" she whispered as she looked lovingly down into the empty crib. I sighed in remorse, today was going to be awful for Bella. I was going to have to watch her relive the pain of losing our child all over again. Ever since that day Bella had been in denial and was living as if our sweet little girl had come home with us. Esme said something about it being a defence mechanism, Bella's brain trying to protect her from the unbearable loss she had encountered.

I slowly inched my way across the room until I was stood behind her. I wrapped my arms around her waist and softly whispered into her ear "You go have a shower and I'll stay here with the baby" I finished my sentence with a tender kiss on the back of her neck.

"Edward, her name's Renesmee!" Bella shouted indignantly pulling herself away from my embrace. "Why do you always say daughter, or baby, or daddy's little girl but never her name?"

"Be.."

"You know what I don't care" she cut me off. "I'll go have a shower and maybe you can bond with your daughter, Renesmee" she dragged out the name, then stormed off into the bathroom.

As soon as Bella had left the room I finished my sentence "Bella, I don't call our daughter by her name because she died last week in the hospital" I sat down in the rocking chair and sobbed silently as I heard the running water of Bella's shower.

I wiped the tears from my eyes as I heard the doorbell go. I ran downstairs and opened the door "Hi Alice" I said, embracing her as she walked through the door.

"Where is she?" Alice sighed.

"Upstairs in our bedroom, she's just had a shower" I explained.

"How are you holding up?" she enquired as she began walking up the stairs towards our room, I was following close behind.

"You know, so so" I shrugged.

"Bella, it's Alice. Can I come in?" she knocked on the door.

"Yes" came her reply. As Alice went into the room and over to Bella, Bella asked "Edward, can you go check on Renesmee for me please?"

"Uhm, yeah" I needed Bella to remain calm so thought it would be easier to agree with her rather than remind her of that god awful day in the hospital.

Alice looked over to me, her eyes full of understanding. "Go Edward, I'll make sure that Bella is dressed in time"

"Edward, I don't understand" Bella said worried, grabbing hold of my hand. "Why does the priest keep on talking about Renesmee like she's dead" her voice dropped to a whisper.

"Bella, remember that day in the hospital when they took Renesmee" it hurt to think let alone say her name aloud "to surgery?" I asked.

"Yeah" she replied puzzled.

"Honey, they weren't able to fix the problem and our little angel died that day" I watched her face, looking for the recognition in her eyes.

"No, no you're lying" she said, standing up, her chair scraping across the floor, a sea of faces all concentrated on the scene up front.

"Bella, love maybe you should just sit down for a minute" I stood up a little, put my arm on hers, trying to pull her back into her seat.

Her arm flung out of mine and she went running up to the priest "Stop it, stop it. This is all wrong my daughter's not dead."

"I know this is a tough time dear" the vicar replied.

I quickly ran up to Bella and tried pulling her away so that the service could resume. "Come on, lets go back to our seats" I pleaded, taking hold of her hand. Esme moved to come towards us but I signalled for her to stay where she was.

"Let go of me Edward" Bella snapped, once again breaking free of my grasp. "What have you done with Renesmee?"

"She's not here Bella, she never was. That's what I've been trying to tell you. You've been living in a dream-world" My words were cold and harsh but I didn't know what to do anymore. I was only just handling my own grief and I didn't know how to deal with Bella anymore. I had hoped that coming to the funeral would make it real for her.

"Stop lying" she said through gritted teeth.

"I'm not. Please, try to remember that day at the hospital"

I sat there and watched as she began to process what had occurred on that fateful day just one week ago. "Noooooooooooooo, Renesmee" she choked between heaving sobs as she fell to the ground. Luckily I was there to catch her so that she didn't hurt herself, I wrapped my arms around her, holding her as tight as would be comfortable. Her body wracked with sobs as I watched her relive the death of her daughter all over again. She was going through unbearable pain and I was powerless to do anything to stop it, the only thing I could do was hold her, I rocked her back and forth as we sat there in each others arms.

"Esme, is there something you can give her to help calm her down?" I asked, I hated seeing Bella in so much pain.

"Edward, Bella needs to grieve for her daughter" Esme explained. I knew she was right. As Bella's sobs began to subside I found myself crying as well. We were locked together in our grief.

**A/N please let me know what you thought. Thanks**


	2. Bittersweet

**A/N Sorry it's taken so long. I'm afraid you guys are in for another tough time with this chapter :( There are some good points throughout as well though : )**

**Shout out to Everclearbabe for being my unofficial betareader**

**BPOV**

"Edward" I call him closer to me.

"Yes" he speaks softly, taking my hand.

"I don't mean to be rude but I'm exhausted and I think it would be best if I went upstairs" I whisper.

"Of course, just let me tell Mom where I'm going" he kisses my cheek before running off to speak to Esme.

Within what seems like seconds Edward is back, his arm around me as we begin to walk up the stairs. I'm so emotionally and physically drained that I can barely move and Edward is supporting almost all of my weight. My eyes are red raw from all the crying.

Edward gently places me on the bed and then kneels down by my feet and slips my shoes off, then he swings my feet round onto the bed and I lay down. He slips one arm under my back and lifts me just enough so that he can put me under the covers.

"Edward, I'm so sorry for everything I've put you through this past week" I say, realizing how I had been in denial about the death of our daughter.

"Shh, don't be. It was your way of protecting yourself" he said, his hand caressing my face.

"I guess" I shrug, my eyes are really heavy now and I'm struggling to keep them open.

"Get some rest now" Edward says, standing up. Then he leant over and kissed me tenderly on the forehead.

As he left the room he switched off the light and closed the door. I rolled over onto my side and curled myself into a ball and fell asleep.

"Bella, honey are you awake?" I heard Esme's soft whisper as I began to wake up.

"Yeah" I said groggily, slowly adjusting myself into a sitting up position on the bed.

"How are you sweetheart?" she asked, perching on the edge of my bed and passing me a cup of coffee.

"You know" I shrugged. "Thanks for the coffee" I added before taking a long sip.

"If you ever need to talk you know I'm here for you"

"Thanks Mom"

"Do you feel up to going downstairs and saying hi to a few people?"

"Umm" I began.

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to" Esme quickly interjected.

"No, I want to" I said with conviction. "Can I just have a few minutes to freshen up?"

"Of course honey. I'll see you down there" Esme smiled, and then she left.

I went into the bathroom and had a quick shower and then came back into the bedroom and picked out a smart, black dress that fell to the knee. In the time it took me to get dressed and do my hair there was a knock on the door.

"Knock, knock" came the velvet smooth voice of my beautiful husband.

"Hi" I turned to face Edward and felt my lips pull up into a weak smile. Within no time at all he had walked the few steps that separated us and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, lifting my chin up so that my eyes met his.

"Better, thank you" I smiled sweetly.

"Why are you thanking me?" he asked, a quizzical expression on his face.

"For being you" I brushed my lips across his and kissed him gently.

"You ready?" he asked as we broke apart from the kiss. He took my hand in his as we made our way down the stairs to our families and closest friends.

I tentatively moved, putting one foot in front of the other. I felt a slight pressure on my hand as Edward gave me a reassuring squeeze. "Bella, if you don't feel ready for this you don't have to go down there" he said, his voice full of compassion.

"No, I have to Edward" I inhaled a deep breath before putting on a brave face and continuing on down.

Charlie was the first to greet me at the bottom of the stairs. "Hi Bells" he said solemnly. "You OK hun?" he asked.

Oh God, I could feel the tears welling up in me again. How is it possible that there were still more tears to come? My Dad gave me a big hug and whispered in my ear "I'm sorry I didn't mean to get you all upset" his voice raw with his own emotion.

"That's OK Daddy" my voice cracked as I said Daddy, I felt guilty that I was making him feel bad just for asking me if I was OK. Throughout all of this Edward stayed right by my side. He was my rock, as long as I have him with me I feel that in time I will begin to function again, he was what kept me going, but he had to be feeling his own grief and I wasn't exactly helping was I?

"I should probably be going, got an early flight back home tomorrow. If you kids need anything just give me a shout, day or night doesn't matter I want you to know that I'm here for you. Love you Bella" he said, giving me a parting kiss.

"Thanks Charlie" Edward said, answering for the both of us as I was unable to speak through my sobs.

He left and then there was only Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and Alice left in the house. They all had solemn faces and didn't seem to know how to act around me. Edward passed me a tissue so I could wipe away my tears, something told me that we were going to have to do a bulk buy on Kleenex!

I walked over to the couch and plonked myself down next to Alice. "Alice I want to thank you for all your help today" If it hadn't been for her I don't think I would have ever made it to my daughter's funeral and the pain I'm feeling right now would have been a thousand times worse if I had missed my final chance to say goodbye to my sweet little baby girl.

"Of course" she said, clasping hold of my hand, then we all sat there for a good long while in silence, but it wasn't awkward as words needn't be spoken, the important thing was that we were here, together. I'm still amazed every day by the amazing friends and family that both Edward and I have in our lives. Esme had offered her help to me, Charlie was prepared to drop everything going on in his life with a phonecall from myself or Edward.

"Bella, Emmett and I are going to go now, but I'll drop by tomorrow after my shift and bring you some of my famous mushroom ravioli" Rosalie said, being the first to break the silence. I stood up to escort them to the door.

"You don't have to do that Rose" I said, opening the front door.

"I'm not taking no for an answer. I want to Bella. It's not that big a deal me making a few dinners for Edward and you"

"OK thanks" I was so touched by this gesture from Rose, we weren't close friends like Alice and I were. Also she's not one of the most warm people so the fact that she was doing this for us was even more touching then what Alice had done for me today (only because Alice exudes warmth naturally)

"Stay strong" Emmett said, giving me a quick hug and peck on the forehead.

"Thanks guys, Rose I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

"You betcha" she smiled weakly. With that Rose and Emmett left.

Alice and Jasper had just left, this was about ten minutes after Carlisle and Esme had gone home. Now Edward and I were here alone. We were both completely shattered, although I had a sleep earlier on it didn't make me feel any less drained now.

"Should I make a list for Alice" I yawned.

"No, she knows what we like" Edward grinned. Alice said that she was going to do some grocery shopping for us. Once again I am truly touched at how amazing these people are.

"I should probably do the dishes"

"I'll do them in the morning" Edward said, switching out the light, putting his arm around me and pushing me towards the stairs.

It didn't take long for us to fall asleep tonight.

_It was a beautiful sunny day and Edward, Renesmee and I were in the park. I was sitting on the luscious, green grass watching Renesmee and her father throwing a Frisbee back and forth between them. My little girl was five years old now and would be starting school next week. I was nervous about how she would cope with her first day. Edward kept telling me to stop worrying about it all. Renesmee certainly seemed excited to be going and making new friends. _

_Our little girl had gorgeous auburn, ringlet curls and rosy red cheeks, it was obvious which parts of her were Edward and which were me, thankfully she had her father's looks! I tore my eyes from my beautiful daughter and transferred them to my stunning husband and my breath caught at the sight of him in his dark blue jeans, and tight black t-shirt, showing the definition of his muscular chest. The sun glistened off of his bronze hair. We had been married a little over five years now and I still couldn't fathom why he chose me?_

"_Mommy, mommy come and play with me and Daddy" Renesmee shouted with exhilaration. _

" _I'm coming" I rushed over to my sweet girl and pulled her up, swinging her round in a circle. _

"_Yay, again again" she screamed, a smile spreading across her face._

_After swinging our daughter round a few more times I put her down and Edward came up to us with the bags I had left where I had previously been sitting. "Time to get my two favourite girls home" he smiled. _

"_Daddy no" Renesmee stomped her feet into the ground and crossed her arms._

"_Five more minutes" he always was a push over I thought as I rolled my eyes at him._

"_What?" _

"_Sucker" I whispered and then kissed him tenderly on the lips. _

"_Euwww" Renesmee said tugging on my dress. _

_As we left the park Renesmee was skipping along just in front of us as Edward and I walked hand in hand, the sun beating down on our backs. _

I woke up with a start and it took me a few moments to realize that it had just been a dream, but it had felt so real to me, a glimpse of what our lives would have been and it was as if she had been taken away from me again. "Why? Why did you take her away from us? I want her back, I want her back" I screamed up at the ceiling, so loud that my voice was hoarse and then I collapsed again in a fit of heavy, racking sobs.

**A/N I promise things will start to get better for Bella and Edward but it may be a while yet. Let me know what you think thanks : )**


	3. Life Goes On

**A/N Hi guys, sorry it's taken so long again. Having major issues with writers block so I'm getting these chapters up as soon as I'm feeling inspired. Once again thanks to Evercelarbabe for being my unofficial beta : )**

_**Life Goes on**_

**EPOV**

I awoke to Bella's screams. "Bella, sweetheart what's wrong?" I asked, stroking her hair away from her face.

"It was just a dream, just a dream" she said amidst her sobs.

"Did you have a bad dream?" I cradled her in my arms, rubbing my hand up and down her back in a futile attempt to soothe her.

"No. Oh, Edward it was a beautiful dream. Our little girl was five and we were all at the park. Renesmee and you were playing Frisbee whilst I was watching. I miss her so much Edward" she barely finished the sentence before she was overcome with grief again.

"I know you do darling, I do too." My voice cracked as I became lost in my own emotions, hearing Bella talk about her dream had me imagining what our lives would have been like had our beautiful little girl not died. If you had asked me a couple of weeks ago I would have said that it was not possible to have this much love for someone that you had only known for a brief amount of time. How wrong I was!

After about an hour Bella had exhausted herself and was sound asleep again, I could only hope that she would find peace for the rest of the night and not awaken again. She had hardly slept at all in the past week and I think it was starting to take it's toll on her.

About thirty minutes later I quietly slipped out of bed, as I now couldn't get back to sleep! I was just so worried about Bella. I glanced over at the clock it was 3am but I had to make the call, I needed to talk to someone and I wasn't going to wake Bella and burden her with my problems when she was dealing with her own grief.

"Hello" Dad answered the phone, sounding half asleep which didn't come as any great shock considering the time.

"Hi Dad, it's Edward. Sorry to wake you, I need to speak to Mom, can you wake her up?"

"Hi sweetie, what is it?"Just hearing my Mother's soothing voice was enough to make all my inner strength crumble and I began to bawl like a baby.

"Sorry to wake you" I managed to say between my heavy sobbing.

"Don't be silly, you can call me anytime and I'll be here for you and for Bella"I choked back another sob.

"Mom, I don't know what to do. I'm so worried about Bella and what this whole situation is doing to her"

"What's wrong with Bella honey?"

"She had a dream tonight and when she woke up she was in floods of tears. It were as if she had lost Renesmee all over again. I want to be strong for her Mom but I don't know how much longer I can keep up putting on a brave face"

"Edward, Bella knows your grieving too. Infact by putting on a façade she's probably questioning whether you feel anything over the loss of little Renesmee?"

"Oh God, I never even thought of it like that" had Bella already started to think this way? Did she think I was cold, emotionless and dead inside? When my guard had been down she had seen me crying so I guess I shouldn't be too concerned.

"Edward I need you to promise to do something for me OK?"

"OK"

"Don't hold your emotions in, don't feel like you have to be strong for Bella's sake. You're going through this together and you should be there for one another. It's not healthy to bottle all your emotions up."

"I love you Mom" I said, my eyes misting over as I felt the tears that I had been holding back rising to the surface.

"Love you too sweetheart"

I put the phone in the cradle and then made my way back upstairs to our bedroom. Bella was still fast asleep and as I watched her she seemed as though she were at peace and was getting the rest she so desperately needed!

One week later.

"Bella, I'm off now. Are you sure you're going to be OK?" I shouted up the stairs. I was going back to work for the first time since Renesmee's death. After all I couldn't put it off forever and I thought that maybe working would help take my mind off everything seeing as you didn't seem to have a spare minute working in a busy County ER.

I felt bad leaving Bella on her own but I had discussed going back to work with her and she said that she thought it was a good idea, after all we had to go on living our lives. Mom said that she would pop over this afternoon and keep Bella company. Mom had been a god send to Bella and I these past couple of weeks I don't how we would have coped without her. For that matter all our close friends and family had been extremely supportive.

"Edward, I'll be fine" Bella ran downstairs and wrapped her arms around me, planting a soft kiss on my lips. "Have a good day at work" she smiled, which in turn had me smiling. I hadn't seen Bella smile like that in awhile. This morning was the first time I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and believed that Bella and I would get through this.

I set off into the bitter cold of a typical wintry, Chicago morning. I turned my collar up and pulled my hat right down, over my ears, trying unsuccessfully to keep myself warm. I didn't take the car to work today, I wanted Bella to have it should she need it for anything. I walked briskly to the El stop and got on the Express to the hospital.

Twenty minutes later and I was looking up at County General. I knew that to begin with it was going to be difficult working here, the place where my daughter died.

I took a deep breath and walked through the ambulance bay doors into the ER, past chairs where the sick or injured sat waiting, some quietly, others not so much. "Hi Edward" Rosalie came towards me and gave me a hug. "Good to see you back" she smiled.

"Uhm, good to be back" I half heartedly smiled back at her. Of course Rosalie was one of mine and Bella's closest friends and these past couple of weeks I had seen a different side to her and I finally understood what it was that Emmett had seen in her. Only he saw it instantly where as it had taken a situation like this for the rest of us to cotton on to how compassionate Rose really was.

"Edward, I didn't expect to see you back so soon. Are you sure you're OK to be working. If you need a couple of weeks we can cover your shifts" Mike said as he walked towards the admit desk.

"I'm fine Mike" I said, shaking his outstretched hand. Mike and I were now on good terms and whilst he was still technically my boss being the chief of the ER and all, I now had the same powers as him since I had got the attending position here. This would be my first shift as a fully fledged attending.

"Hi Edward. I was so sorry to hear about what happened to your little girl, send my love to Bella" Tanya said, smacking gum in her mouth. Up until that point I hadn't even noticed her sitting there she hadn't even registered on my radar.

"I will" I replied, forcing down the emotion that her comment had brought.

"I'm just gonna go get a coffee and then I'll be back for rounds"

"OK. But Edward, I want you to take it easy today. Keep it light, ease yourself back in, no major Trauma's" Mike called out to me.

"Sure Mike" Maybe I would spend the morning to keep him sweet, but I wanted to get stuck in come the afternoon. As far I was concerned the busier I was the better.

**A/N Please let me know what you think of the latest chapter : ) Also if you have any ideas for what you would like to see happen in this story feel free to suggest them to me and they may just end up appearing . Thanks : D**


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